It was the evening of 23rd October 2013, Aseem was supposed to receive his medical reports in the evening. Since about a month he has had this nagging cough, which just wouldn't go. He had a bit of a fever, the night before, and thus had decided to consult a doctor once again to get rid of this cough once and for all. He had taken a half day from the office to meet his family doctor. But in the morning, for some reason the family doctor's clinic was closed and he ended up visiting this small nursing home instead, which in it's quest to earn quick bucks made him undergo several tests. The general blood reports which come within few minutes of giving samples were of some concern. The White Blood Cells’ count was alarmingly high at 265000 against the normal 11000 max limit. It was in this context Aseem and Divya were getting ready to get the other reports and meet the senior doctor at the nursing home.
As they entered the senior doctor's cabin, she just asked a few general questions to Aseem and sent him off for Sonography test and asked Divya to wait.
In about half an hour Aseem came back. Divya was waiting for him outside. Both of them had decided that they will go for a walk and then come back home. Aseem noticed that Divya was quiet and was answering Aseem’s questions in not more than few words. She said that as per doctor, Aseem might need some treatment and that he will be all right in few days. Aseem had gauged that what senior doctor has told Divya is not something routine or normal and Divya is holding onto something, however he did not push her. Both of them continued with their walk for about 30-35 minutes and came back home.
Their daughter was still at daycare. As soon as they came back Divya just hugged Aseem tight and started crying uncontrollably, as if she wanted to hold onto him and not let him go anywhere away from her. She just kept saying I won't let you go. Aseem had realized that this is all about those reports that doctor had discussed behind his back, while he was afraid himself, he somehow held on to his nerves and tried to calm Divya down. In about 15 minutes she somehow controlled herself and told that as per doctor it's Blood Cancer.
The news was devastating, several questions started coming to Aseem's mind. I don't drink, I don't smoke then why me, my daughter is just 5 years old, how much time do I have, is there anything that can be done or no, I haven't saved enough just as yet to make my family sustain if something happens to me etc.
Both of them held onto each other for next fifteen minutes, trying to gain strength from each other, trying to calm each other down. After about half an hour of silence both of them decided to speak to a few people (family and friends).
Aseem spoke to his boss and informed what doctor has said and asked for a couple of days off. They also spoke to the families on each side just to get some strength from them. By around 8 in the evening they had decided to visit one of the most famous hospitals for cancer treatment in India to seek advice.
Both of them were courageous enough to quickly come to their senses, not panic and hold each other in the most difficult time of their life.
In next couple of days, Aseem went through various tests, and the 1% chance that both of them had in their mind of previous diagnosis being wrong was eliminated. By 25.10.2013 it was confirmed that Aseem had Chronic Myeloid Lukemia (CML) and was put on the treatment immediately.
Next few days were going to be the test of their ability to come over difficult times. Both of them were committed to be each other's strength. While on one hand they started to look at their finances (converting all Aseem's account into joint accounts etc.), Divya also started reading through all the possible information that was available in books, websites, blogs etc. Aseem wanted to keep himself away from too much of information and was just committed to follow the advise and fight the disease with all his inner strength and will.
Time passed by, they both had come to terms with reality, had accepted the fact that there's no 100% cure for this and they will have to continue fighting it. Aseem had responded well to the treatment and had achieved a few important milestones in about 6 month’s time.
It was going to be a fight that will never end, it was going to be the test of their will power, it was going to be the test of how strong their bond is and how strong their support for each other can be.
It's now 5 years, the fight is still on, they have had several ups and downs in these five years, in terms of Aseem’s response to the medication and achievement of key milestones. The have worked their way out of initial panic and have matured a lot. They have started taking things at one appointment at a time.
While Aseem has still not been able to achieve one major milestone in expected time, both of them have now reached a level where they are no more scared of what is going to happen. They have got tremendous support from family, friends and a few colleagues and are sure that they will defeat the disease which in most cases gets better of it's victim.
These five years have taught a lot to Aseem, he has made peace with life, stopped being dissatisfied with small setbacks and has learnt to be content. He has started appreciating small things in life and get happiness out of it.
On almost every other visit to the hospital for checkups he comes across people who are fighting much more difficult battle than what he is and on every other appointment he come across people who inspire him to continue the battle relentlessly.
Aseem also draws his will power from the thoughts of his grandfather who used to say ‘an ill body does it's job by troubling you, but you should keep on going and not give up as that's your job’. This unique way of looking at yourself, separate from your body can really bring out the inner (mental, emotional) strength that one needs while fighting these diseases.
He has started firmly believing in a quote he once read somewhere 'I don't know how my story will end, but it will nowhere read, I gave up’.
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